You know we had a lot of fun with Zombie Jokes (via Gimmie 5 cents) here, first we reported on Zombie Unemployment:
Joblessness up 20% among Zombie Population Many claim discrimination in favor of the living.
Then we talked about Massachusetts taxing and rewarding Zombies:
Massachusetts uses a different means of determining eligibility for unemployment. Under their constitution, the Commonwealth is able to tax the dead and undead alike, making Ms. Glass eligible for state-funded retraining, health benefits, and Affirmative-Action based job placement.
“I thank God for the Socialist Republik Commonwealth of Massachusetts,” Ms. Glass says. “If I unlived elsewhere, I wouldn’t even count as a person.”
Then we saw the White House Zombie appointment:
Among growing concern over jobless rates and and basic civil rights for America’s zombie population, the Obama administration announced this week the newly formed Department of Undead Affairs, to be headed by Chicago democrat Fred Murman, who has just been appointed as secretary.
Congress reacted:
“He may smell a bit but he has a heart of gold.”
Of course the appointment had tax issues:
An unexpected snag occurred today as members of the senate ethics committee uncovered documents related to Mr. Murman’s death, showing that his family never paid the required death or estate taxes associated with his death. Mr. Murman and his representatives were unavailable for comment on the allegations, brought forth this morning.
We had a lot of fun with these posts but who knew that it was all real:
This week, thousands of people are getting stimulus checks in the mail. The problem is that a lot of them are dead. A Long Island woman was shocked when she checked the mail and received a letter from the U.S. Treasury — but it wasn’t for her.
Antoniette Santopadre of Valley Stream was expecting a $250 stimulus check. But when her son finally opened it, they saw that the check was made out to her father, Romolo Romonini, who died in Italy 34 years ago. He’d been a U.S. citizen when he left for Italy in 1933, but only returned to the United Stated for a seven-month visit in 1969.
You know when they say that life is becoming impossible to parody. It’s getting that way isn’t it?
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