Posts Tagged ‘family’

I have five living kids at home, and would have an additonal six year old girl with Down Syndrome had she not died after a failed heart surgery. I also have a pretty odd mix of friends, most of whom don’t have a family anywhere near my size, so I get asked a lot of questions about raising a large family. The most common questions come from younger couples asking about when the right, perfect time is to start a family.

And well…there isn’t one.

Someone might tell you to at least wait till after high school, which sounds like pretty good advice. After all, you probably aren’t married in high school, need to finish your diploma, and let’s be honest, most high schoolers don’t think through such life altering choices as having a baby.

Yet I know a few families that were high school sweethearts that married in or pretty near to high school graduation. My mom was one of them. She was married at 18 to my dad (who was graduating college and 4 years her senior) and somehow managed to successfully raise three kids while traveling the world with a Marine Corps officer. Compare that with too many of today’s graduates that can barely write English papers and brag about doing their laundry only a few days late with hashtag adulting on social media. Perhaps that says more about the current state of education than family planning though.

We could pick more times: after you finish your degree, after to start your first job, after you “settle down” (whatever that means), or after you are “ready” (seriously, what the heck does that mean??). But every time you try to nail down a right time, you’ll find lots of counter examples of people starting families that don’t follow that logic that come out just fine.

Which is why there isn’t a perfect time to start a family. Sadly, I see too many good, family-oriented couples searching for the perfect time to start a family. Many of them pray over it, but their prayers revolve around asking God to tell them when to start a family, like they expect some booming voice to emanate from the clouds declaring “Have intercourse at 6:35 pm on July 12th!” or some other nonsense like that. This delay and worry is part of the reason people are waiting later and later to start families, which makes it harder to have children as your biological clock only runs at full tilt for so long.

The recent SCOTUS decision is likely making many couples revisit this question. Abortion and contraception make it appear to give us control of when we have children. Neither does, or certainly doesn’t without consequences. Accepting the challenges, and the joys, of having a family will mean accepting it on the timeline that it comes to you.

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…but I’d like to thank everyone who has hit the tip jar this weekend, that managed to pay for the rental and Stacy has been hitting the Gas so that has covered the trip.

Not to mention a huge thank you to the Lonely conservative and her husband who are slightly less lonely since they are allowing Stacy and I not only Crash but allowing us to snarf their internet to allow us to post.

Finally as I was writing this post I found out that my wife’s Aunt Shirley just died today. She single-handedly saved out honeymoon when Citi Travel didn’t take care of our booking. She and Uncle Bob gave us the use of their guest house and their spare car and the money we saved became the down payment for our house.

We can never repay her for that kindness and we will never forget.

An FYI Off with my son today… UPDATE Funspot blogging!

Posted: August 24, 2010 by datechguy in personal
Tags: , ,

In NH conservatives aren't the silent type

to Funspot. Today’s posts will be mostly scheduled so approval of comments might be slow. I don’t know if they have wi-fi but I don’t know if I really want to spend time posting from there.

If you want to see my post about Funspot, the largest arcade in the world it is here.

Update: My son and his young lady classmate are off playing games and my hands are a little sore from 2 hours + of pinball so taking a break to use the Wi-fi and blog a little to give em a rest.

One of my many Nephews (Italian Family you know) has very little in common with me: I am bald he has a full head of hair, He is ripped I am fat, I wear a beard, he is clean shaven, he plays several instruments from violin to guitar, I don’t. He is very single and looking, I’ve been married for 22 years, I am very Catholic, he is not but we discuss and debate religion whenever we talk.

We both however have one thing in common and that’s a very different set of priorities than the Ewock Women of Emily’s list.

The Ewock women of Emily’s list publicly support abortion with every fiber of their being. They consider it such a priority that they declare the willingness to sacrifice the lives of their grandchildren as an expression of love for their daughters.

My nephew Matt has told me that it is a Sine Non Qua before even considering dating a woman that she be pro life. In Massachusetts that really narrows the field, when asked he told me bluntly. “I don’t want to end up with any woman willing to slaughter our daughter or son.”

My no drugs, no booze no sex rules not withstanding, I would never want any grandchild of mine to ever think I disappointed by their birth. I would much rather see rings on fingers first, but whenever they come, I will be pleased to see them.

It’s is love vs hate. Matt and I love our children and grandchildren that we have never seen so much that we will sacrifice to protect them. The Ewock of Emily’s list, a group that is supposed to be exist to advance women in office, hate Sarah Palin so much that they proudly declare their grandchildren expendable.

Memeorandum thread here