Delaware: A trio of elite Russian Agents assigned to acquire classified documents for Russian use turned themselves into US authorities when they unexpectedly discovered that President Joe Biden kept the garage housing these classified documents locked:
“I could not believe it” moaned Igor Moehowardavich at his arrangement. “A decade of training, four years undercover in America and all our plans foiled because President Joe Biden anticipated us by locking his garage.”
The trio having heard about the documents in the garage through sources moved to acquire the classified material, but confronted with the locked door and seeing no way around such a formattable defense Moehowardavich and his associates Lev Findgoldalov and Chary Q Stoogakalev surrendered to FBI agents who came across them accidently after being alerted by a tip suggesting there might be parents objecting to CRT in the area.
Democrats such as Adam Schiff praised the foresight of the President’s steps to secure the documents in his possession while the Administration took this opportunity to attempt to open talks in the hope of trading these agents for US citizens held in Russia but at last report Putin is quite content to allow America to keep them.
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